The concept of split energy and what to do about it is coming up in my coaching with working mums so I thought it would be helpful to share.

What is split energy?

At its most simple it’s when our energy is pulling us in different directions and stopping us from getting what we want.

An old coach of mine described it as like a pen with a lid. If we hold the pen in one hand and the lid in the other hand the pen lid represents the smaller positive energy directed towards what we want and the rest of the pen is the larger negative/ other energy that pulls us away from what we want. So our energy is torn and we need to find ways to integrate the two parts to help us align our energy and move towards what we want.

For example, as a working mum we are pulled in so many different directions and often it’s hard to get what we want or feel like we have the life we want. We may know what we want but then worry about the impact of our decisions on others (guilt), what others are thinking of us (judgment) and how hard it is to manage everything (overwhelm). These feelings (guilt/ judgment/ overwhelm) pull our energy away from the thing we want. We become out of alignment and feel torn.

What can we do about it?

The causes of split energy are complex and multi-faceted. However, one approach to overcoming split energy is to know and believe you can get what you want without doubt, and then orientate your energy, time, focus, what you do, which battles you fight, who you spend time with, the support you ask for etc towards that.

Start by getting clear

It starts with getting clear on what you want. One mantra I like is: “Find what feels good”.

As Oprah said recently in an interview with Trevor Noah on The Daily Show:

“People get to where they want to go because they know where they want to go… A lot of people are going and being driven by what they think they should do, what other people say they should do, what they have carried in their mind for a long time that they say they should do. But the most important question you can ever ask yourself is what do I really want… Once you establish for yourself what the answer to that is and have everything you do, every choice you make move you in the direction of what you say your vision is. When you do that the forces of life rise up to meet you.”

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences of this!

This article was written by  Georgina Gray one of our partner coaches who supports women who walk with working mums, literally (on coaching walks in nature) and metaphorically, offering creativity, compassion and challenge to help you lead a more authentic, intentional and values-aligned business/ life. You can get in touch via her profile page.