“Grounded confidence is the messy process of learning and unlearning, practising and failing, and surviving misses.” – Brene Brown, Dare to Lead.

When someone has confidence in you, they trust you. I am always amazed at the confidence crowd surfers have when they leap off stage into the arms of the crowd.

Self-confidence has two sides: on the one side, we have to trust in our ability to dare and take the leap. On the other side, we must trust the environment to catch us!

During March, we celebrate International Woman’s Day. As a result, you may receive calls to Be More Confident, Walk Taller, Speak Smarter and Look Sharper. These are good suggestions, but it is only one side of the coin. If we only tell women to try harder, we forget the other side of confidence: a trusty environment that supports these efforts.

How can we create confidence-supporting environments?

We can set reasonable expectations for women in whatever stage of life or career she might find herself in:

Pregnant? She might need more time for doctor’s appointments.

School-aged children? She might need flexible hours to accommodate the school run.

Overwhelmed? She might need a cup of tea with a friend or a coach to support her in her challenges.

And a significant level of confidence is, of course, when we ask someone to help us: so don’t forget to reach out when you need support too!

As women, we also need to be aware of how we can support each other: be the hands that catch that brave woman confidently leaping from the stage, ready to crowd surf. Listen to ideas, cheer efforts, and advocate for women’s issues when there is a need for them.

That way, you will not only boost the confidence of other women, but they will trust you to be a confident cheerleader and support you when you confidently leap into the crowd.

Click here for a printable download with prompts to help you plan your confidence-boosting moments, or contact me for a free 15-minute consultation to see how working with a coach could support you with your confidence.


Our partner coach, Elrika Erasmus, director of Coachmind Consulting, wrote this article. She is a qualified and registered Practitioner Psychologist and ILM Level 7 Coach. She applies psychological expertise to coaching frameworks when consulting. You can contact her at elrika@coachmind.net