You made a decision — maybe about work, childcare, a return date or a life shift — and now… it doesn’t feel right anymore. But instead of changing direction, you find yourself powering through, because:

“I’ve already told people.”
“What will they think?”
“I don’t want to be flaky.”

Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth: changing your mind isn’t flaky. In fact far from it, it’s growth, it’s awareness, it’s brave.

Especially as mothers — and especially for those of us navigating layered identities — we are conditioned to stick things out. To prove we are strong. Grateful. Capable. To carry the load, even when it is quietly breaking us and we are slowly disconnecting from ourselves — until we are so far removed that we barely recognise ourselves.

But what if pivoting is actually the most powerful move?

You’re not the same person you were before that decision. Your child’s or children’s needs may have changed. Your needs may have changed. Life may have changed. You’re allowed to change, too.

And remember this: happy mum = happy child. Like the oxygen mask on a plane, your wellbeing comes first — not as a luxury but as a necessity. Those ripple effects of your joy? They’re powerful.

If you’re at a crossroads, I created a short, free tool called Is It Time For A Change? — it’s a gentle starting point with a few simple prompts. Simply click the link and download the FREE tool.

No pressure. No five-year plan. Just space to listen to yourself again.

Because when we honour our needs and choose again, we model self-trust and emotional resilience — for us and our children.

According to Mental Health Foundation, 1 in 5 mothers experience mental health challenges during or after pregnancy — many stemming from pressure to “do it all” or fear of judgement. For mothers facing compounded systemic barriers, those pressures can be even heavier. Therefore, the more we normalise permission, nuance and support, the better for all of us.

So if you’re feeling the nudge… this is your sign. Not to blow everything up. Just to pause. Reflect. And know: you are allowed to change your mind.

 

Ella is an intersectional Coach and a Partner Coach with Careering into Motherhood. For more information about working with her visit her profile page with us here

 

June 2, 2025